If you want to wake up like this…
Drink me.
Whole bunch romaine lettuce
Makes over 16 ounces
My walk home from work is always an exercise in resilience. Fantasies of running away to a farmhouse hidden in some small coastal town weigh heavy on my mind. I know people who never get this kind of live entertainment in a lifetime; cops wrestling chemical-filled hobos to the ground, a cheating husband being chased by a baby-carrying, knife-wielding wife and third alarm crack-hotel fires, all in a 2-mile vicinity. San Francisco you are like those men I hate to love. This little refreshing number helped me rehydrate and recuperate from the world that says fuck you.
Juice one cucumber and small watermelon. Top it off with a little blackberry. Enough for two. If you have extra, pour some in an ice tray. Perfect flavored ice cubes to bring some life to a glass of water or mint capirinhas, recipe to come soon. I love summertime.
Preternatural beauty starts from the inside. Cleansing the body of drink, drugs, pesticides and smog is important to keep skin vibrant and soft because, who am I kidding, none of us can quit the bad shit all at once. This drink is a little of the Zen and Juice to keep your insides and outside immaculate. Look out for my upcoming post on the best herb combination for cleansing the blood and balancing hormones. The best thing to wean yourself off of pharmaceutical candy.
“The blood of these whores are killing me.” – Andy Warhol’s Count Dracula
Juice
4 stalks celery
1 cucumber
4 red radishes
4 leaves romaine lettuce
4 leaves green chard
Juice of 1 lime or lemon
Then run 3 inches of ginger or turmeric root through your juicer so everything doesn’t take on the overpowering taste. Finally take it back quick and chase it with the green juice.
I finally got a quality juicer to replace the one Patrick Bateman might have used. My Breville Compact is a beauty, it’s centrifugal, so some might have qualms with this type ’cause of oxidation, breaking down of cell walls and exposure of oxygen, but as I see it, most people aren’t juicing as it is so, there is no need to get all wound up about losing a few nutrients and antioxidants. Just juice and fill your skin with color and vibrance from underneath. Which brings me to the juice that stole her virginity, La Vampira. This potion will make your skin pulsate and no one will be able to keep their teeth off of you. This juice is best drunk on an empty stomach in the morning, immediately after juicing. Never store juice to see the full benefits.
6 kale leaves (Sulfur rich, the queen mineral of skin and hair beauty)
6 romaine lettuce leaves (Silicon rich, keeps the blood warm and the skin elastic)
Juice of one lemon (Don’t place in juicer, squeeze separately)
1 medium beet (Kill free radicals)
3 celery stalks (Blood cleanser)
1 cucumber (Full of an enzyme cleansing for kidneys)
